Shake Things Up

Have you ever felt like you just needed to shake things up? Like you just desperately need some kind of change to occur, and fast? I have that feeling so bad right now. Everything is so stagnant, everything is always the same. I get up, I shower, I go to the soul sucking job where I do the same monotonous tasks over and over, I come home, play with the dog, eat, Boyfriend comes home, we watch some TV, then we go to bed. It starts all over again the next day. Sometimes the order of things after work changes around, but pretty much it's the same routine every day.

Sometimes I wonder if the longing for change is a control thing. I have no control over anything in my job. I go in, and do my rote tasks, and wait for other people to tell me other rote tasks that need to be completed. In a way my ex-husband still controls my finances, since he talked/prodded me into buying a car I can barely afford, therefore I'm usually pretty damn broke. I go home to a wonderful man that I love very much, but who is not my husband, and I long so much for him to be my husband. Another thing that is completely out of my control. I live in a city that I had no intentions of living in for 8 whole freakin years but alas, I am broke, and don't want to leave Boyfriend so moving will only come with a new job for him. For now, none of these circumstances will change.

Now some may say, "Hey! That still sounds like a damn good life" and it is! Don't get me wrong. I am just a person who thrives on change, and new challenges and experiences. There is nothing new. Ever. And so contemplating how to make NEW happen. I guess I'm going to cut and/or color my hair. Superficial, but change nonetheless.

P.S. Any suggestions on the hair?

I Am Blessed

Have you ever committed an act of kindness for someone for no other reason than to just to see the smile on their face? I do it a lot. I'm a sucker for smiles. It makes my day.

Sadly, there are some cynics around who say things like, "That was an awful lot of time/energy/money/effort you spent on so-and-so, would they have done the same for you??" My answer is often, "Yes, I guess it was, and I don't know; it doesn't really matter."

Kindness knows no conditions. Acting from the heart and expecting nothing in return is what we should all strive for daily. I am blessed to have people in my life who know this, and I am blessed to be able to give from my heart with no expectations.

Sometimes you have to stop & remember the good things.