Wednesday, July 1, 2009

13 Things I Hate About You

Okay, Driving in Memphis? Not quite as magical as "Walking in Memphis." So here's a list of 13 things I hate about you, Memphis drivers. (I am exempt, by the way. I learned how to drive in California where they require driver's education classes before you can get a license.)

  1. Coming to a complete stop on the interstate to change lanes because no one will let you in, even though you don't have a turn signal on.
  2. Cutting off people who are driving faster than you, then staying right in front of them even though you could get back in the slow lane
  3. Driving 45 in the fast lane. Heck! No one seems to realize the left lane is for going fast
  4. People driving very slow 3 across so no one can get past any of you
  5. 18 wheelers in the fast lane and/or driving 3 across
  6. The emergency lane is for an emergency, not blowing past traffic & then trying to merge back in. You're really not more important than everyone else.
  7. Looking for something you lost on the passenger side of your car & swerving into the lanes of traffic next to you.
  8. Getting so caught up in talking on your cell phone while driving your huge SUV that you don't even realize there is someone next to you in the lane you're trying to merge into.
  9. Chillin in the middle of a shopping center exit lane with no turn signal, so I have NO IDEA whether you're turning right or left out of the place.
  10. The general disregard for the use of turn signals
  11. Honking at someone you've just pulled out in front of for being in your way
  12. Turning left long after the arrow has turned red because 'wait your turn' doesn't apply to you.
  13. Swerving in and out of traffic erratically at high speeds. Just because you watch a lot of NASCAR doesn't mean you drive for them.

2 comments:

  1. This post is, as usual, hilarious. All those things you described are spot-on. I have to drive in L.A. again soon (2 weeks) and I am NOT looking forward to being around those crazies on the road.. even if only for 2 days.

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